Haibun Self-Portrait ( Outside the U.S. District Courthouse in Vermilion County )( Leave It To the Good People of Central Illinois To Have Named This Province After the Most Toxic Mineral Known To Man )( )( A.K.A. Cinnabar, A.K.A. Mercury Sulfide )( Twelve Hours After Spotting Three Crosses Burning a Hole In the Night Sky On a Not-Too-Distant Hill Off I-74 )( Not More Than a 2-Minute Drive From You Now Stand )( Minutes After Telling Your Editor-In-Chief “The Klan is Here” )( Who Left His Cushy Job in Central FL To Move With His Wife ( Your Good Friend For the Past Year ) And Three Kids Back To His ‘Hometown’ Newspaper )( Who (After Closing The Door To His Glass Office, Put His Hand On Your Shoulder and Offered You a Striped Butter Mint And a Day Off In the Not-Too-Distant Future When He’s Hired A Few More Good Reporters Like You ) Said “No, They’re Not,” ) )( You Taste the Red Tide Churn Of Algae On Your Tongue, You Recall It Was a Full Moon Last Night )( Isaac Newton Once Said the Full Moon Affected The Ocean Water Inside the Human Body, Causing Epilepsy, Kidney Stones and Menstrual Cycles – You Look Closely At Your Editor and Wonder Which Of Those Conditions He is Experiencing )( Followed By the Most Damning Thing a Newspaper Man Can Say, “We Shouldn’t Rock the Boat.” )( Leave It To the Good People To Have Adopted the Northern Cardinal As the State Bird When They Should Have Demanded Ostrich )( Not to Be Too Picky, But You Both Know Central Illinois is Practically Land-Locked )( You Swallow The Mint Whole and Start To Choke, Run Into The Bathroom Down The Hall to Put Your Fingers Down Your Throat, )( Like The Who Song, )( You Remember the Sindoor, the Vermilion Powder Hindu Women, Married Hindu Women, Put In the Part Of Their Hair )( To Denote Their Marriage Status to Society )( You Remember Reading There Is Unsafe Amounts of Lead In the Powder Your Mother and Grandmothers and Aunts and Cousins and Friends Use )( You Think Back To the FDA Analysis and the CDC
Warning, That Lead Exposure Leads To I.Q. Loss, Attention Deficit, Leading To Loss of Academic Achievement )( Then Hyperventilate Before Grabbing Your Keys and Heading Back Outside )) Waiting For The Verdict To Come In ( On a Totally Unrelated Search & Seizure Case, You’re Sure ) — Danville, IL 1990
God, I quit.
God, I’m broke.
